Toilet Book

Quote of the Day

Philip Yeo said that "everything I do now, I have to do IRR (Internal Rate of Return), EVA (Estimated Value Added). You think Attila the Hun or Genghis Khan calculated EVA before they attacked?"

"If you want to make lemonade,you must get the lemons first, then squeeze. Not sit around and calculate how much juice you may be able to squeeze from each lemon."

Well said. That's why I think civil servants in ivory towers, schooled in the academy of theories, don't fare well in entrepreneurship. I confessed I do fall into the trap of over-planning, over-researching instead of doing the actual thing.

It's like one of those productivity scheme, where we have to squeeze our busy times, or stay overtime to brainstorm on how to be more productivity in the office.

I have to remind myself, that I just have to go ahead, do it, and then learn along the way. It is better to have a lousy product, then have a perfect planning and still not out with anything. But the perfectionist in us says, "It is not good enough. It is not ready to be produce".

And this is my struggle as I anticipate my first published book. Lots of questions like which title is best, which format - ebook or printed book, how much, what to include, 1 thick book or split into 4 booklet. Decision, decision, decision.

Self Publishing

I bought a book on 'Self Publishing secrets' by Justin Wizard. He works on a farm, and he sells his knowledge by self publishing his photostated papers on a spiral ring binder. I learn that everyone has a different preference.

I love the feel and texture of a book. I like to highlight, underline it, carry it with me. I like to hold a book. So e-book is not something I can feel sentimental about. I enjoy looking at the design of the book cover. To read a book is to enter into the world of another person, to have a glimpse of a person's life. That's very touching to the soul. To me, a good book must have a good cover, a bigger and a darker font for easy reading.

Books Ideas
I went for the MPH Book Warehouse Sales and got some good buys. I bet few people knows that MPH stands for Methodist Publishing House and it was founded by a missionary who was born 150 years ago. Browsing through the books gave me so much ideas of the books that could be written.

Toilets.
I wonder if anybody has written a book about the 'Toilets of the World'. That would be fascinating look at the architecture of this sort. In Singapore, we have the Restroom Associatoin of Singapore. It's 5-year old. There's a hygiene grading for the toilets in Singapore, a toilet song. What's next? If you observe what's in the toilet, that's interesting - the kind of posters. What's odd in Singapore is that you get to see female cleaners in male toilets.

We can tell a guy by the way he shows his asset. If he is cocky and confidence, he will flash his asset to the female cleaners when the opportunity arise. The shy one will hide in the cubicle. The defensive one will whistle to drown the noise of the waterfall. The insecured one will look at the guy next to him and compare their sizes. Wow, you can judge a man by the way he behave in the toilet. Isn't this a great idea for a book?

And don't forget to throw in some toilet jokes or toilet misadventures.

Sometimes I joked to my audience that for those who hate to sell, a toilet attendant would be the perfect career. You don't have to harass people for a sales. People will visit your toilet automatically, thanks to the call of nature. When nature calls, you can't bargain. Leave your shit here or take it!. The slogan is "Your shit is my bread and butter". If I have the money, I would open a chain of toilets - with piped in music, fragrance, video advertisement, a venting machine for condom, sex toys, a classified advertisement board for lonely people, for farting contest and courses on how to wear a condom. The toilet is the last unconquered frontier for marketers.

I heard that the toilets in China are atrocious. Hmm...sound like a good place to start a toilet business there. Don't you know that the more shitty the work, the better the pay. Hey, Singaporeans complain they don't have enough jobs, but the government says there is plenty of jobs.

Do you know that plumbers are paid better than lecturers? They clean up people's shit.
Do you know that prostitutes make more money than factory workers cos they suck up people's ass and mess? That's a messy face job.
Do you know that dentists make good money cos they have to smell and see the rotten teeth day in and day out?
Do you know that lawyers make good money cos they have to get involved in quarrel in the court, throwing mud, accusation, and wasting dirty clothes in public?

That proves my theory that if you want good money, do the dirty work. I once asked my friend who retired as a LTC from the Army, who he was doing for a living. He said he pick up people's unwanted rubbish. He was in the business of recycling. It was a multi-million dollar business. He died suddenly while jogging on a fine day. Bless his soul.