The Price of Success

The Land of Opportunity

Singapore is remaking itself to become the Land of Opportunity. 1 in 4 workers in Singapore is a foreigner.
Sacred cows are slaughtered in the remaking.

An entrepreneur with business venture in China said that one must be prepared to taste the bitterness of defeat before he can savour the sweetness of victory.

The Price of Success
Probably the most well known Chinese in the world today is Jacky Chan. Today the confession of his son is an eye opener. His son said his dad hardly spend time in the family.

If you see someone at the pinnacle of success, and you wish you are like the person, are you prepare to pay the price of success ? The sweat of hard work and discipline, the sacrifice of not doing other things and a life of dedication to the craft, almost to the neglect of other aspects of their life. Count your cost.

A moment of Insight

A moment of Insight

What makes a great start to a day is a cup of coffee and the newspaper. Reading thousands of words is like opening a stream of thoughts through my brain, leaving behind an impression... and soon the rest is forgotten.

Suddenly I realise, in a moment of insight, if I could have the discipline to focus on quality rather than quality, would I not have learnt more? If I could read one good article a 100 times, dissect it, analyse it to its bone, and reproduce it to memory, would I not have learnt more than reading a 100 articles once?

Instead of learning 10 words a day, would it not be greater if I simply learn 1 word a day and write it a 100 times unless it is commited to memory forever?

Eloka for Writers

www.eloka.com
This website is good for writers who want to publish their printed books and ebooks in Asia.

Writing Courses

Writing Courses

I have signed up for a course Write Your Life Story at www.writersweekly.com/wwu/courses/memories.html. The 6-weeks course starts on 1st March 2004. Conducted by Angela Hoy of www.booklocker.com

I have just signed up for a writing course: Write for your Life! Become an Inspirational Writer!
www.suite101.com. The 4-lessons class starts in mid April 2004. Conducted by Sara.

I felt that for this year, it would be wise to invest in one course a month. The day you stop learning is the day you stop growing. I allocated about $100 a month to education. I would advise you to put aside 5% of your salary to self improvement. The best investment is your own. You can't lose.

2002 was the year I established Changi Simei Toastmasters Club
2003 was the year I took up the Diploma in Training and Development
2004 is be the year of learning the Craft of Writing.

Story Telling

Telling and Showing

Kaz from www.writers.net illustrates so beautifully the difference between telling and showing a story:

"You did that wrong!"
"No, I didn't!"
"Yes, you did!"
"Stop lying!"

While those short sentences convey anger they are still a bit flat.

The head secretary tossed the papers on John's desk. "You did that wrong!"

He took a deep breath and barely above a whisper said, "No, I didn't!"

"Yes, you did!"

He met her look head on and rasped, "Stop lying!"

(telling)
Father was still deeply saddened twenty years after my mother died. He wept when I handed him an old photo of her.

(showing)
When I handed Father an old photo of Mother. His eyes welled with tears and his voice cracked with emotion when he murmured, "I miss her so much."

Vanity Press vs Traditional Publishers

Vanity Press Vs Traditional Publishers

At www.writers.net, someone said:

"Traditional publishers pay the author for the project.
PODs take money from the author i.e. vanity press."

How to Tell a Story

How to Tell a Story - The Secrets of Writing Captivating Tales (by Peter Rubie and Gary Provost)
Gary Provost share this template for writing a plot:

Once upon a time, something happened to someone, and he decided that he would pursue a goal. So he device a plan of action, and even though there were forces trying to stop him, he moved forward because there were a lot at stake. And just as things seemed as bad as they could get, he learned an important lesson, and when offered the prize he had sought so strenuously, he had to decide whether or not to take it, and in making that decision he satisfied a need that has been created by somehting in his past.

Remember Your Past. Write It and Publish It! in as little as 12 weeks!

Today I subscribe for this course which is conducted by Angela Hoy at www.writersweekly.com. She also runs a publishing company at www.booklocker.com. The 6-week course starts in March.

It was cheaper than the others and within my limited budget. I thought it would a good way to force me to write something everyday. If it works, I hope to waste some money in having an ebook with Booklocker, just for the learning experience.

I am also looking at www.cafepress. com. This is a good place to consider if you want to print one copy to get a feel of what your book will look like - for just US$10. No setup cost.

A Wasted Life
A reluctant bride, age 17, attempted suicide by drinking bleach after his Pakistani parents planned an arranged marriage with a distant cousin. One day she vanished and her decomposed body was found. I felt sad that her parents is so set in her culture that the ways of her society is even more important than the life and happiness of her daughter.

Many Wasted Life
In Uganda, 200 people were burnt to death by rebels. The rebels raided a village, got the families - mothers and children including - into their hut and burnt them alive. I could not imagine the horror, the atrocity, and the helplessness. If I put myself as a mother in the burning hut, and these were my precious children, to hear their scream, and the licking fire burning their flesh, and even the gods stare helplessly as we burnt in fury hell....

Who is Justin Wizard

Who is Justin Wizard

He is a person to model. He say he can't afford to work for a living. Consider the 30% tax, the transport cost and associated expenses. He is living the kind of life that we all dream about - in a self-sustaining farm. He writes for a living. I bought his book "Self Publishing Secrets"

He inspired me to form the writers' circle.

Writer Your Memoir

Write Your Memoir

Book Packaging at www.memoirist.com
Write Your Life Story - A course at http://www.writersweekly.com/wwu/courses/memories.html
Write and Sell Your Personal Essay - A course at inspired2write.com

What is a Pyramid Scheme

What is a Pyramid scheme?

Ann Queue said it beautifully:

"A pyramid scheme is one where you pay 5 bucks to get in, then take a dollar from all the new people you convince to join and pay 25 cents of it to the person who convinced you to join. When no one else joins, the newest participants are out 5 bucks"

William Hung

William Hung

Hung is the most famous (or infamous) Chinese today, besides Jacky Chan.
I think about what makes him (in)famous and what he means to different people.

Talk shows are booking him for appearance and to give a rendition of his 'she bangs' move.
He has high entertainment value. Is it cos' he gives audience the permission to laugh at him?
Are we seeing a trend towards shock values? E.g. if Janet Jackson has her breast exposed, doesn't that helps the rating for the show?

To Americans, it reinforce the stereo-type of Chinese people who are polite, nerdy, have no fashion sense, and studious.

To some, it represents what true American spirit should be - doing the best, believe in your dreams, and walk out high without a whine.

When a Person Dies

Thought of the Day

Edmund White said, "When a person dies, a library is burned."
(extracted from http://www.inspired2write.com)

“The future has several names. For the weak it is impossible; for the fainthearted it is unknown but for the thoughtful and valiant, it is ideal.” – Victor Hugo

Credentials+Experience=Good?

Credentials + Experience = Good?
Several readers wrote to the newspaper to share how their lasik surgery gone wrong.
They pay a lot of money for good senior surgeons with impeccable credentials and world-class experience.

Here's the conclusion drawned by Ms Chan S.H:

"Credentials and experience do not necessarily lead to quality care. A less experienced but more careful consultant may do a better job than one who is more experienced but overconfident".

Ms Ong S.L said:

"After my bad experience, I wonder: Does paying more necessarily translate into better professional consultation and service?"

Food for thought.

Beggars or Fund Raisers?

Word of the Day
I come across a lot of new words today.

Farce: www.dictionary.com says A ludicrous, empty show; a mockery: The fixed election was a farce.
e.g. "do it wrongly and fund-raising becomes a farce for a rich school"

Ambit: scope. E.g "ambit of religion"

panacea A cure-all for all difficulties

gloat : To feel or express great, often malicious, pleasure or self-satisfaction:
E.g. Don't gloat over your rival's misfortune.
e.g. my gloating reader

Boor: a rude person

School means Study, not Sales Quotas
Someone complains that school children have been pressured by the school to raise fund.
If the tickets are not sold, thei students are scolded for not putting in the effort.
Parents, relatives and colleagues of their parents donate money out of a sense of obligation.

Even if the money has been raised, what has been learnt by the students?

Most schools failed to turn a fund raising event into an education in entreprenuership. Instead it has been become a nuisance for the students and parents. They lack the initiative to get the students involve in creating and selling their own products. Most take the easy route of getting donors to give at least $2 and sign their name on a blank piece of paper.
As a donor myself, I have no idea why they need the money for and I naturally presume that the Govt is not providing enough for the school.

Mr Michael Loh Y.M. suggests that students should be taught how to ask, when to ask, what tone to use, how to handle rejection, when to be persistent and how to describe what they are doing, or what the collection is for.

Where's the training? Where's the personal involvement? I think the teachers themselves need to be taught, not just the students.

"Back to school, teachers!!!"

"The Truth is Out There. Help us Report it"
That's the headline for an advertisement for journalism scholarship. Well said.

Make Money with No Money

Make Money with No Money

Two entrepreneurs made a wager that they can "make money with no money".
They emptied their pockets and hit the streets. At the end of the day, they managed to get free meals, a free hair-cut from strangers and a $500 investment in exchange for advertisement space in their office.

Family Pains

On 2 Feb, my elder daughter, Anne Marie age 4 was trying to steal some cookies from the kitchen counter. She fell from the stool and cracked her elbow. She was in tears, pain and now in bandage. Doctors said she is likely to have an imperfect elbow cos of misalignment.

I have told her a zillion times and she never listen. Looks like one has to learn the hard way. It's pains me to see her hurting like that. The pain killer can only do so much.

Discrimination Against Old Age
Older workers are supposed to have more experience, better work ethics and less likely to job hop. But once they reach the retirement age of 62, all these means nothing for the organisation. They are given a new work contract that's not in their favour. They are deemed less valuable once they turn 62. What more, their employer CPF contribution is greatly reduced.

In response to a complaint in the newspaper, the organisation said they value his contribution, that's why he was still employed on a new mutually-agreed terms. I personally call this exploitation of labour.

How do you expect them to upgrade their skill or motivate them to give you their best if you pay them peanuts. Dilbert says they should lower the quality of work to match the level of pay.

Technology at the Cost of Jobs
A govt body was so efficient with its computerisation efforts that it managed to cut down the workload of its workers. Now they have to lay off 6% of its workforce cos they are now redundant. Now you wonder if the workers have any more motivation to support computerisation if the computers will one day replace them one day.

Marriage the Family

Marriage

When you marry a person, you marry the family as well. It comes in a package.
Don't believe what I say?
Do you know that the next to money problem, the main cause of marital breakdown is due to in-laws problem.
If you want to know how your life partner looks like in their old age, look at her/his parents.
If you want to know how your life partner is going to bring up her children, look at her parent's parenting style and family background cos they are her role model.

Now we have a national campaign at Romancing Singapore to remind Singaporeans to be romantic. Some wonder if there is a hidden agenda to encourage more marriage, and more babies? Other countries are teasing us for having campaigns for just about everything.

Well campaigns is our way of national education. It has work for us so far. If you want a national education of another sort, refer to my favourite website www.mrbrown.com for a satire look at the bureacracy of the country.

IQ and EQ

IQ and EQ

Someone commented that Singaporeans are high on IQ but low on EQ.
She suggested that we should bring literature back to the school otherwise we produce a generation of people with brains but without soul.
We are good at hardware, but poor in heartware.

My friend observed a scene in the bus when school children refused to give up their seats to the elder.
Oh what has become of this young generation?

Recently, there was a fight and a man was stabbed to death. None of the bystanders lend a helping hand.
When asked why, they said, "It's none of my business".

Language of Love

The Language of Love

Today is Valentine's Day. According to Gary Chapman there are 5 language of love, namely:
1. Words of affirmation
2. Giving of gift
3. Physical touch
4. Act of service
5. Quality

Know your spouse preferred language well.

Military Slogan & Strategy

Strategy

When you are strong, act weak.
When you are weak, act strong.

Slogan

Sun, Sand and Sea
Join the Navy.
Moon, Mud and mosquitoes
Join the Infantry

(source: http://www.sgforums.com/)

What are you Selling?

What are you Selling?

Valentine is in the air. The cash registers are ringing. A group of students found a novice way to make money - as singing telegram. I like what Ryan said "

"While others are selling gifts, we are selling entertainment and memories.
We are not selling gfits that sit on your desk and collect dust"

Well said, Ryan. Your make it to my quote of the day boy.

The Joy of Parenting

What's the Cost of Raising a Child?

Singapore is having less and less babies. All the incentive don't work.
Of course what. Say one thing, do another thing. So many rules.
Mothers must be below 31.
Adoption procedures so slow
Adoption children not entitled to child relief.
High maid levy (when levy is more than maid's salary), how to ask wife to work
Cannot walk around naked at home.
No oral sex.
No adult educational video.

Govt says: "Come on, be more productive. For the nation, for the nation".
Some complain that this is a personal matter. "Everything also must get involved", some said.

Here's one reader shared about the joy of parenting:

Naming rights. Glimpses of God every day. Giggles under the covers every
night. More love than your heart can hold. Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies. A hand to hold,
usually covered with jam.

A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites, building sand castles, and
skipping down the sidewalk in the pouring rain. Someone to laugh yourself
silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that
day.

.. you never have to grow up. You get to finger-paint, play
hide-and-seek, and never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse
to keep reading the Adventures Of Pooh and watching Saturday-morning
cartoons, going to Disney movies, and wishing on stars...

... there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero
just for retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, taking the training
wheels off the bike, removing a splinter...

You get a front-row seat to history to witness the first step, first word,
first date, and first time behind the wheel.

You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree,
and, if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called
grandchildren.

You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice,
communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.

In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there with God. You have all the
power to heal a booboo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a
broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them
without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the
cost.

Marriage-is it still Relevant

Marriage - is it Still Relevant

The greatest cause of divorce is marriage.
A lasting marriage is as rare as finding a 40-year-old virgin.
It leads one to wonder whether the marriage vow of "Till death do us part" still relevant today.
Or should marriage be a 6-year contract?

Are human-being capable of sticking to a partner for life?
To those in an unhappy marriage or abusing situation, can the pastor still insist on counselling them to stay put and expect a miracle, or expect that it is their solemn duty to remain, as a commandment of God.

Tell me, my friend.
Do we obey God cos He said so although we don't understand why,
or do we listen to our hearts and say, "Quit and move on. Find your own happiness"

I find it irony that it is so easy to get married, but so difficult to get divorced.
Friend, there is no trial marriage. It does not come with a warranty period.
Children, whether plan or accidental, are not like goods. Sometime they turn out ok, sometimes they are like critters.
Unlke goods, they are not returnable.

Kids are Fragile

Kids are Fragile - Handle with Care

I don't know what's with Marie, my 4-year-old 'Daddy's girl'.
Wonder if she has an eating disorder. She always feel hungry and never feel full.

Once she put her fingers on the bread over the stove and burn her finger. Now it's a scar.

Another day, her sister pushed her and she got a cut on her forehead. Now it's a scar.

Yesterday, she tried to some food from the kitchen top. But the stool fell and she fractured her right elbow. Now it's in bandage.

For a young, but strong girl like her, she was in great pain through out the day and crying in pain.
I told her countless time never to steal food. But she never listen.
Will she ever learn, even with the hard way?

When she breaks her bone, she breaks my heart.
Her angelic face and body is now imperfect - a scar here and a scar there.

I gave her a good scolding. With a guilty look, she asked me, "Daddy do you love me?"
I said "Yes I love you because you are always Daddy's darling girl.
But I don't like it when you are naughty and never listen to daddy"

"It is painful" she moaned.
"What can I do? Let's pray to Jesus to take away the pain". I felt helpless.
I can wipe the tears from face.
I can give her painkiller.
But I cannot take away the pain of a fractured bone,
or the scar of the skin
or the sorrow of her heart.

Are you a Leader?

Are you a Leader?
Yesterday I was one of the judges at one of Bukit Batok Toastmasters Club Table Topic and International Speech Contest. The question posed to the contestants was: "Leaders create more leaders, not more followers". The club President exhorts us to be leaders of change.

I am reminded that each of us are to be leaders, leaders of our own lives, by embracing change and taking a lead in steering our own destiny rather than let the wave of life rock us to nowhere.

As I observed the champions in action, their great performance has put me to shame. I humbly reminded that's so much I need to learn to be a better communicator.

Today, in the news, there is an unsung hero in Mr Andrew Choo. There are 966 secondary school dropouts in 2001. So he set up a school for such people. Started with only 12 people. Found that most of them could not afford the $20 monthly fees. The school cost about $300,000 a year to run. The Presbyterian Church is helping to raise fund.

I admire people like him who sees a need and take action. Yes, for pioneers like him, there are giant obstacles ahead - getting the fund, getting supporters, convincing the 'customers' to stay in the program. But the vision and dream is bigger than the obstacles.

There is another unsung hero in Queenie Tan. She personally delivers food to the poor old people in their single room apartment. She pay about $2000 out of her own pocket money. No sponsor, no fund raising.

These are the true heroes - unsung, unseen, unknown. Yet in their own small way, they are changing lives, and making a difference to the people they touch. That reminds of the classic story of a person who throw starfish from the shore into the sea. A passerby asked why she is doing it when there are thousands of starfish and many are dying anywhere, so what's the deal on a few fish. She replied that it makes a difference to the one she saved.

As I sit next to my 4 year old daughter and teach her to trace the alphabets, I realise that in each of this precious moment, I am moulding her. I have become a god to her. Someone say that the best way to understand your parents is when you become a parent yourself.